Reading For Dad: A Personal Reading Project
by Jenners • 09/05/2009 • Reading Challenges • 31 Comments
First of all, I want to thank all of you for your supportive comments regarding the death of my dad. Your comments helped me so much, and I really appreciate them more than you will ever know. Our visit to Montana was very healing, and my dad’s memorial service was a beautiful thing that helped our family begin the grieving and healing process on a positive way. It was so touching and comforting to hear from so many people about how my dad had touched their lives. One common refrain was “Your dad never wasted any time.” That is so true … and I think it is a lesson that we can all benefit from. Fill your days with things that interest you, love the people you are with, and never miss an opportunity to pursue your dreams.
As I was thinking of a way to honor my dad, one thing that occurred to me was to read some books in his honor. I picked 12 to start with, and I think that reading these books are a wonderful and meaningful way to both honor my dad and maintain a connection with him. I know he would have LOVED this idea!
Here are the books that I’m choosing to read and why I chose them.
- Catch-22 by Joseph Heller. This was a book my dad gave me to read when I was about 12 and I just loved it. (Although I suspect I missed a lot of the nuances — I just thought the names were hilarious — Major Major Major Major, Milo Minderbender — and I loved the whole Catch-22 concept.) When my mom told us to look through Dad’s bookshelves to look for anything we might want as a remembrance, I found three copies of the book! So this is must read.
- The Once and Future King by T.H. White. I mentioned several times about how my dad and I read this book out loud when I was a young girl so I’m going to revisit this book to recapture some of those moments. Plus, my dad was a huge fan of King Arthur books — reading everything from Malory’s Le Morte d’Arthur to Marion Zimmer Bradley’s Mists of Avalon.
- Do Black Patent Leather Shoes Really Reflect Up? by John R. Powers. This is another book that my dad introduced me too. He loved it because he related to the story of growing up Catholic in the early 1960s. Revisiting this book is a way to revisit my dad’s formative years, which were filled with nuns and pranks.
- Musashi by Eiji Yoshikawa. Once when I was having a tough time in college, my dad wrote to me and recommended this book. (Only my dad would recommend a 970-page books about a Samurai warrior to a college sophomore as a way to get through a tough time.) He’s tried to get me to read this for years, and I never did. I’ve asked my mom if I could have the copy of the book that he searched for in used books stores for years, and she should be sending it soon. (My dad was very into things Japanese as he served in the Navy for three years when I was a baby and was stationed in Japan. I spent the first few years of my life in Japan — which accounts for why I have problems saying my “Rs” to this day.) COMPLETED
- Knights of the Black and White by Jack Whyte. About a year ago, my dad sent me a box of books that I had asked him for as I didn’t want to buy a copy when I knew he had them and had read them already. Mixed in with the books I’d asked for where copies of these Knights Templar books (of which this book is the first). Every few months, my dad would ask me if I had read the books yet, and I hadn’t. (They are hard copies and weigh about 3 pounds each … plus I hadn’t requested them!) But darn it, you wanted me to read them Dad so I will!
- Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson. This was one of the books in the box that I had asked for. It was one of those books that I kept seeing around everywhere, and I knew my parents had it so I asked them if I could borrow their copy. Then, my mom and dad saw Greg Mortenson speak at the local library and were inspired to donate $600 (!!!!!!!!!!) to Mr. Mortenson’s cause. This type of donation is unheard of in my family so obviously I need to read this book. Plus, my dad kept promising me he was going to write me an article for this blog about Mr. Mortenson’s talk.
- Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson. Right before he died, my dad was reading a bunch of classic books that he either hadn’t read at all or hadn’t read in a long time. This was one he was raving about and told me it was a “must read.”
- The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky. This is another book that my dad quoted to me over and over again and that I always promised him I would read someday. It is also a nod to his Russian heritage, which he found so interesting and engrossing. (Both of his grandfathers were stowaways who left Russia to escape the Revolution.) COMPLETED
- Fool’s Crow by James Welch. My dad had a long-term love for the state of Montana. He had visited in his 20s and fell in love, and our whole family moved out there from New Jersey when I was in high school. I asked my brother Chris for a book I should read about Montana that my dad loved and this was one of his three suggestions.
- Grizzly Years by Doug Peacock. My dad LOVED grizzly bears. Any time he spotted a “griz” on one of his expeditions into the Montana wilderness was a happy happy day. He had quite a collection of books on grizzly bears, and I asked my brother Chris for what I should read on this topic. This book was him immediate answer.
- Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind by Shunryu Suzuki. As I mentioned earlier, my dad had a love for things Japanese, including Zen Buddhism. He was very interested in Eastern religions and when I took a World Religion course in college and became fascinated by The Upanishads, he was there to talk to me about some of his favorite books on Eastern religions. This was one of them, and I think it is a good place for me to start exploring.
- Where the Mountain Casts Its Shadow by Maria Coffey. I was always bothering my dad to read my book blog, and he did. The only comment he ever left me was a book recommendation in my book category on real life survival books (a genre of books I enjoy reading thanks to him). I immediately remembered this book after he died as it is a book about the personal costs of adventure — with a focus on mountain climbers. As my dad died due to a mountain climbing accident, this book is no longer a “might read someday.” It is a book that I must read. He read it and told me to read it — obviously not knowing the personal meaning and impact it would have for me and our family. It gives me the shivers that he told me about this book and then died while mountain climbing. I hope to gain some perspective on why he climbed and insight into some of the feelings I have about his accident. When I was out in Montana, my brother Chris gave me my dad’s copy of this book. I shall read it in his honor — as I do all of these books. COMPLETED
Jen, I will bring you dad's copy of "Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind" next week. You should also read A.B. Guthrie's "The Big Sky." It's historical fiction about the waning of the mountain man era. I found Dad's old copy and he read it just before he spent that fateful summer on the Pallister Ranch outside of Boulder when he fell in love with Montana. Guthrie was talking about his father being "under the big sky" when he first moved to Choteau. This is where the state's best sobriquet originated. Love ya. Chris.
Best of luck with this challenge. I think this is a great way to honour your dad. Thanks for sharing the stories behind each pick.
What a wonderful idea! Will these be your dad's copies of the books, or will you buy your own?
You know, I was thinking this sounds like a really great idea. I think I may do this, too, if you don't mind. Except I think I will do it in January, which is when he passed. I just don't think I am going to be able to do it right now. Maybe memorializing him by reading his favorite westerns (he loved him some Louis L'Amour!)would be a good idea. I know I had read one in January before he died so I would not be able to read them after he died, but I don't know if it helped. It almost reminds me MORE of him, if that makes any sense.
I will give this some more thought.
I love that your list has meaning behind each selection.
This is a beautiful idea. May you feel his spirit with you as you take this reading journey.
I think this is a wonderful idea and a great way to remember your father.
–Anna
Diary of an Eccentric
What a wonderful way to honor your father! I enjoyed reading the story behind each of the choices.
I am so sorry Jen, to hear about your dad. What a wonderful heritage he shared with you–the love of reading and books. I think there is no better way to pay tribute to him. He sounds like a wonderful man, who will be greatly missed.
*hugs and a squeeze*
Kim
I am sorry to read about your dad! May this reading project continue to help you with the grieving process!
I'm so sorry about your dad! I've been away too long. Once again, I think you've found the perfect way to pay tribute to someone. You're so good at that! Thoughts and love to you!
What a neat way to honor your dad!!!
I can't wait for reviews!
{{{HUGS}}}
What a fitting and creative way to honor your dad!
Hey Jenners, what a wonderful idea! I would hope one day one of my children (if I ever have any) would feel like this would be a proper way to honor my memory. That being said here are some of my thoughts on your choices:
Catch-22, hilarious. It will def keep you laughing, which I am sure is something you could use at the moment.
Treasure Island- That is the very first 'grown up' book I can ever remember reading. I was very young and my mom sat there for page after page while I sounded out all the words, and worked through each chapter. It was what made me love reading and is still one of my fondest memories to this day, so I would love to think that it connected another family in that way.
Also if you haven't already, I would look into 'Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance'. It is about the journey a dad goes on with his son across country. Might be a bit nostalgic, but is still beautiful. Stay strong Padfoot and I are sending you all of our good thoughts vibes that we can muster up.
What a great idea for remembering your dad! And wow…he had diverse tastes!
Jenners, I know your Dad would love that you're honoring him with this reading journey. It looks like our Dads had another thing in common (not just a love of The Pink Panther). My Dad also read Suzuki and encouraged me to do the same. The Brothers Karamazov is my favorite Dostoevsky novel. I remember reading it through my first pregnancy. Gotta love those big Russian books to pass the time.
I'm praying for you and your family during this difficult time. Big hugs!!!!
What a healing process you are beginning. May you find peace and connection to him and the influence he is on you and your family.
Here's hoping your mom and brother find the same healing as they navigate the days ahead.
You're in thoughts and prayers!
Gaye
Those books of your father's will open your eyes to a whole new world. And help you to connect with him even better.
L. Diane Wolfe “Spunk On A Stick”
http://www.circleoffriendsbooks.blogspot.com
This is a fantastic idea! And what a great assortment of books to read! I know it will help in your healing process.
My dad was a big reader too, and I'm struggling right now to remember what he read. I know he was a huge fan of Edgar A. Guest's poetry, but I need to ask my mom what else he liked to read. We always had books around.
Thoughts and prayers are with you!
What a beautiful way to honor your Dad! It's obvious that you shared a special bond with your Dad in your love of reading.
An absolutely amazing and wonderful idea. Oh what super hours you have in front of you. I've read some on the list and others are completely new to me. THis is one that I'll be checking into: Knights of the Black and White by Jack Whyte,
What a wonderful idea! I am sure he would love the fact you are doing this.
That is such a wonderful idea.
My thought and prayers are with you and I am glad to see you taking a positive approach to healing.This will be very special for you and I know your Dad is happy you are doing this. Have a peaceful Sunday!
What a great idea! How lucky you are to have the chance to gain more insight into your dad's mind and heart this way and to share books that were important to him. This isn't something that everyone can do … I, for one, am not interested in a Michael Chrichton and Clive Cussler read-a-thon.
What a wonderful way to remember your father. From what you've said about him, it sounds like something he'd enjoy.
What an amazing way to pay tribute to your father. He sounds like he was a very special person.
Your dad sounds more amazing the more you post. Musashi – wow! Those are quite the books. I'm so glad you had the opportunity to access them! What a wonderful way to pay tribute to him! I hope you keep us up to date with your thoughts as you complete this challenge.
I'm glad that you and your family are beginning the healing process. I had a recent death in the family (last week) and I still have a hard time realizing that that person won't come back.
This seems like a wonderful thing to do in honor of him! Some of the books look really good
I love that you are doing this. It's such a special thing with so much meaning. I'm really glad that the memorial was such a positive experience for you. You've been in my thoughts a heck of a lot lately.
I'm so glad you're doing well. I think this is a great tribute to your dad.