Join the fun over at Mama’s Losin’ It
This week, I’m choosing prompt 5: imagine your life is now a book. In 100 words, write the blurb for it. (It’s what people will read on the back cover.)
In this riveting new memoir, world-renowned blogger Jenners shares the never-before-told story of her lifelong chocolate addiction with brutal honesty, her trademark humor and an unflinching look at the inner workings of the Chocolate Cartel. Sharing harrowing tales that will make your skin crawl—from dumpster diving for chocolate chips to the violent hijacking of a Dove delivery truck—Jenners lays bare the life of a chocolate addict. Tracing the root of her addiction to an ill-fated experiment with carob during childhood, Jenners chronicles her blossoming addiction that spiraled from daily Hershey bars to mainlining fudge in a “choc den” in Kuwait to the highly publicized “Hershey Incident.” Although fans know her as a jet-setting, carefree beauty, only her family saw the desperation and weight gain she tried so hard to hide with false gaiety and Spanx.
It was midnight and a hard rain was falling. The gun was heavy in my hand and my feet hurt, but the pounding in my head told me I had to go through with it. Had I hitchhiked to Hershey, Pennsylvania and killed three hobos with a hammer just to turn around and walk away? No! I must do what I came to do … bathe in a vat of pure dark chocolate. I walked as quietly as my newly acquired 30 pounds would allow me to and turned the knob to the chocolate vat…
“Riveting … I couldn’t put it down … yet I did when the doorbell rang.”
- Maude Kramer, Housewife
“Makes A Million Little Pieces look like a walk in the park … and I don’t think Jenners is lying! A must read and my next book club pick!”
“You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll think about switching to Skittles.”
- J.M. Bock
Hoping you will think that is my actual body on the fake book cover,
P.S. And yes … I spent an inordinate amount of time redesigning my blog last night! You ARE in the right place! What can I say? Blog redesign seems to be my other addiction.