Time for Writer’s Workshop! Head on over to Mama Kat’s to join in.
This week, I’m choosing prompt 1: Describe a job you absolutely would never want to do. (inspired by Karen from Karen & Gerard Zemek). My question is, why stop at one? I could list hundreds of jobs I would never want to do. (But don’t worry … I’ll limit it to just a few.)
- A medical technician who performs anal bleaching. Seriously .. it is a real procedure! ACK!
- Slaughterhouse worker. Just.couldn’t.do.it.
- Crime scene clean-up technician. I can barely watch the crime scenes on Dexter … let alone think about cleaning up the remains of dead people every day.
- Surgeon. Nothing about me is suited for this position—from my poor eyesight to my disgust of blood to inability to debone a chicken.*
- Professional chef. I don’t like cooking at home for three people. Why would I want to do this every night for hours at a time? HELL ON EARTH!
- Cashier. I’m horrible at math. If you ask me “Jenners, what is 18 + 6?,” absolutely NOTHING comes to me. I once worked the cash register at a fast food place, and it was a nightmare. Even though the cash register did all the thinking for you, people would do stuff like give me extra money to get back a round amount and I’d go in to panic mode and get completely flummoxed. I lasted 2 hours before being removed.
- Drive-through window order taker. At the same fast food place where I was the cashier for 2 hours, I also worked the drive-through window. I couldn’t understand ANYTHING the people were saying over the speaker … let alone take orders while handing out food. I lasted there less than an hour … after 5 messed up orders and a long line, I was quickly removed from my post.
- Unpaid worker who cleans up other people’s messes, performs menial repetitive jobs over and over with little or no thanks, and cares for a mercurial tyrant who never stops talking and thinks the world revolves around him. Oh wait … I have that job. It is called Stay-At-Home Mom.
* Not to imply in any way that performing surgery is the same as deboning a chicken. Yet I bet most surgeons could skillfully debone a chicken, whereas I cannot.