I’m done! I’m done! I’m done!
Give me a shot of vodka! No … make that two! No … three!
It was a long haul, and I don’t actually think it was worth it, but I managed to read the entire book. (Well, except The Grand Inquisitor part … only the most important part of the book that I unerringly managed to skip over. It takes skill to do that, I tell you.)
I’m not going to bother doing a write-up of what happened in the last part of the book. All you need to know is that it involved a LOT of talking, Dmitri’s trial (SPOILER: he is convicted) and some other stuff but who cares because I’m done!!!!!!
At the start of this hell read readalong, I said I was reading it for two reasons. One was to connect with my father, who quoted this book to me in a letter I received in college. Well, the joke is on me as I never found the quote he shared. Either he misquoted it or got his Dostoevsky books mixed up. But no way am I going to read another book by Mr. D to find out. This one was MORE than enough.
The second reason I read this book was to answer the smart-ass question put forth by my friend Mr. Debbie Downer, who asked “Which Karamazov Brother is the hottest?” Since I plan on never discussing or thinking about this book ever again, I figured now was the time to answer.
- Dmitri is probably the hottest as far as looks (all the ladies seem to dig him).
- Aloysha is the hottest in terms of personality.
- Ivan is the hottest if your idea of hot is an insane, devil-hallucinating bore.
- Smerdyakov (the illegitimate brother) is probably the hottest from a temperature standpoint … as he turned out to be the murderer AND he committed suicide (frowned upon by the church) … so I’m guessing he is nice and toasty in hell.
So perhaps you are wondering if you should read this book? My answer (in a nutshell) is HELL NO.
The book is endlessly long and rambling and, if you can forgive me, boring. It was a slog to get through it. The only real benefit is you get some vague sense of accomplishment that you finished. Although the finer points of the book might be lost on me, I honestly disliked this book with the intensity of a thousand suns.
As far as I can tell, the only other two left standing in this readalong are the two that came up with the idea in the first place: Jill at Fizzy Thoughts and Trish at Love, Laughter and a Touch of Insanity. My suspicion is that if I hadn’t kept going, they would have quit the whole thing long ago. HAHA … the joke is on you, Trish and Jill! I stuck with it, and I bet you felt like you had to do it too.