Writer’s Workshop: Things My Mother Taught Me
by Jenners • 03/16/2011 • My Childhood, Writers Workshop • 93 Comments
Link up at Mama Kat’s!
Prompt 2.) Things my mother taught me.
Writing this post is bittersweet because I lost my mom so recently. However, writing about her helps make her alive again for me so I welcome the opportunity to revisit our relationship from a happier perspective. So here goes … a few of the things my mom taught me.
- If you get your colors analyzed, you will end up dressing like a marshmallow. When I was in high school, my mom took us to get our colors analyzed by a lady at a fancy downtown store. We both ended up being Springs and received a color palette with a lot of pastel colors. Now we may have misinterpreted things, but all I remember is that I ended up wearing a wardrobe that made me look like a bag of colored marshmallows. It was awful, and—in a fit of rather laughably tame rebellion—I began wearing colors like dark brown and (shivers!) even black.
- If you want to find out how bad something hurts, have your children do it first. When I was in fifth grade, my mom decided she wanted to get her ears pierced. However, she was worried that it might really hurt. So guess who was her guinea pig? Moi! She took me to get my ears pierced and waited to see how I reacted before getting hers done. Because I was such a melodramatic and overly sensitive child, I guess she figured the pain would be manageable if I was able to survive.
- The art of the sigh. When we were kids, we did everything possible to get out of doing chores. Almost every evening we’d begin with a litany of reasons why we couldn’t clear the table and wash the dishes. But my mother—who may have majored in Maternal Manipulation—would always let out this dramatic sigh that would immediately guilt us into doing our chores. It is an art that I’ve been working on for the past few years. One well-timed sigh and letting my shoulders droop and Mr. Jenners and the Little One (usually) leap to help me with whatever unpleasant task I’m doing.
- How to laze away a weekend. When I was in 7th grade, my brothers and dad went away on a camping weekend. My mom decided that we would have a girls only movie weekend. We stayed in our pajamas, ate pumpkin pie right out of the dish (it was right after Thanksgiving) and watched movie after movie. It was wonderfully decadent and glorious, and I have such fond memories of that weekend. I remember watching An Affair to Remember (the original one with Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr) and sitting on the couch, snuffling and crying, while shoveling pumpkin pie into our mouths. What a classic mother-daughter moment!
- If you don’t feel like cooking, burn something and then order a pizza. I remember one glorious day when my mom burnt pork chops (which I detest) and we got to order a pizza for dinner. Even though this wasn’t a lesson she meant to teach me, it stuck with me, and I pull it out when needed.
- You can find incredible strength when needed. You may think that I’m about to write about an emotional moment when my mom demonstrated great resilience in the face of adversity (and she did do that many, many times), but I’m really thinking about the time when our cat Bucky brought a not-quite-dead mouse into the kitchen and batted it behind the refrigerator. My mom—in a feat of strength that astounded all of us, including her—moved the fully loaded refrigerator a few feet in order to get the mouse out of there. Of course, once the danger was gone, she couldn’t budge it and we had to wait for my dad to come home to move the fridge back in place.
P.S. Mr. Jenners forced me to rejoin Twitter today so I could “follow along” as he flew on an airplane to a business meeting. So I figured I would incorporate it into my blogging once I found a plug-in that let me automatically tweet my blog posts. For those of you who like Twitter and communicating that way, my “handle” (is that the right word or is that just for CB radio?) is @jennersreads. Occasionally, I will share my deep thoughts, like today’s revelation when I was cooking dinner: “Highly suspicious of Manwich can claim that it provides a full serving of vegetables.” I will warn you that I have a hard time keeping up with the pace of Twitter so don’t expect much from me in this arena.
Hee. Your mom sounds like the kind of mom I strive to be
Already got the lazying away the weekend thing down with E. She’s not as hot about the idea of doing nothing in our pajama’s all day but she’s 2 so she’ll break eventually 
I can’t get my kid to laze around yet either…I think we have to wait for the teen years.
Great post, one that honors your mother. That weekend of jammies and movies and pie sounds awesome to me!
I’m now following you on Twitter, but I rarely look at it. Who has the time?! I keep telling myself one of these days
You and me both! I’m not a heavy Twitterer but I check in periodically … until I lose interest in a few months and let it lie dormant. : )
Fantastic post! I loved your “how to laze away a weekend”. That is a wonderful memory. I hope my kids remember with as much fondness the time I didn’t feel like cooking “real” food but made two pies and the 4 of us ate them for dinner. That’s a half a pie per person for the mathematically challenged. Best supper ever!
I’m sure they will remember the pie dinner forever — it is always the thing that are off-kilter and different that stick with you. What fun!
I love this, especially the pumpkin pie.
Jenners, you are so funny. I enjoyed reading this post very much.
I’m glad you enjoyed it. Now go burn dinner and order a pizza!
awww…very nice Jenners.
lol I remember getting my colors analyzed with a machine at the supermarket in the makeup aisle when I was a tween. I loved it. Apparently it said I look best is pinks and pastels…*yuck*
A well times ”sigh” can work wonders, I’m the queen of the guilt trip myself.
Your movie weekend with your mom sounds like a lovely memory.
I’m beginning to think this color analyzing was sponsored by the Pastel Cartel!
I love that weekend of watching movies and eating pumpkin pie! Sounds great! Moving that refrigerator was an amazing feat too–quite amazing what actions a little mouse can cause.
Stopping by from writer’s workshop. Here’s links to mine if you get a chance to visit:
http://karenzemek.blogspot.com/2011/03/story-of-love-writers-workshop.html and
http://zemeks.blogspot.com/2011/03/greatest-love-story-ever-writers.html
It was amazing what a half dead mouse can inspire.
what a great mom, she was very astute. I especially like that she made you get your ears pierced first. I’m going to try that technique some time.
It was a very clever and devious move on her part I thought!
What a great prompt! This is so neat…I think my list would be pretty different than mine so I might have to think about this one. Neat!
I’m sure everyone would have a slightly different take on this prompt…but I bet there are some lessons that are pretty universal.
I have noticed that many people have chosen this prompt or when asked whom they would telephone, chose their mom.
Sorry to hear of your mom’s passing and hope you can come to a point soon in which your memories of your mom are mostly of happy ones, which from this post seems like you are already there.
Thanks for your kind comment. Writing this post helped to bring up some of the happier memories of my mom other than the shock of losing her so recently. I needed that … it was cathartic in a way.
Pastel marshmallows, lol. I can just see that.
And I have perfected the sigh – just ask my mom. . .or my kids, lol. I’m on twitter but I don’t really use it much. . .
I had this one puffy sweater thing that was a few pastel shades and felt and looked very marshmallowey — it was horrific! (And I wore it with pastel pink jeans … ugh!)
I would definitely not think of you as a pastel kind of girl…
and I can’t believe your mom moved that refrigerator! Adrenaline anyone??!! That girls weekend sounds so nice! And just think what a great memory that made instead of her taking the weekend to get things done!
Amazing what kind of strength you can muster up when you need it. And thank you for not thinking of me as a pastel girl … I didn’t feel I was deep down. (In my heart, I’m a polka dot girl but I really can’t pull it off. I look like an idiot!)
Wonderful tribute to your mom!
Thanks … it felt good writing it.
You should teach a class in the art of the sigh. I believe I need more instruction on that one because it doesn’t seem to be working.
I have discovered though that if I want to eat out (or don’t want to cook) I just don’t make dinner, explaining to my husband all of the other tasks that conveniently took my attention at that time and how time just got away from me – I had no idea it was so late! I can’t do this as often now though because the kids have to eat at a decent time, but I had it down to an art in the early years of our marriage.
Perhaps I should travel the country teaching all my martyr skills to moms! That would be a lovely business.
And before we had kids and we both worked, Mr. Jenner was the cook! It was fantastic. We all suffer now that I am in charge.
So what do you think it will take for your to move the fridge all your self? I haven’t had one of those moments yet but I know many a mother who has. Here’s hoping I never have to!
I think perhaps a really good piece of chocolate falling behind the fridge might be enough … not for milk chocolate though!
Love this list! I’ve got the sigh down pat, but am thinking of a nose piercing…Maile????
While she is at it, can you have Maile check out tattoos as well? : )
My husband wants me to join twitter but I know it is just one more thing I would spend way too much time on. This was a great post. That mother daughter weekend sounds wonderful. My mom and I used to rent movies and watch them together a lot, I totally forgot that until reading your post.
I’m glad this post brought back a good memory of you and your mom — that makes me happy!
How lucky we all are that you shared your fond and fun memories with us. And how lucky you are that you had such a great lady for a mom!! Never lose sight of the memories that bring the smiles…they help to chase away the tears. (How profound is that??)
Anywho, I did love these, as I do most all of your posts, so on that happy note – go ahead and tweet, but please, please don’t forget to blog. I like it here much better!! =}
Thanks again for making me smile on a dreary, rainy March day
Thank you for such a sweet sweet comment … and don’t worry, my heart always belongs to the blog first. : )
Your mom sounds like she was a wonderful lady and a kick in the pants…the sort of woman I would love to hang out with. I’m going to follow you on Twitter but won’t have any expectations. I joined Twitter and haven’t kept up with the pace but I enjoy dabbling when I have time!
Thanks for understanding about my lazy approach to Twitter — we’ll suit each other just fine.
Your mother was a wise woman and taught you some important things! I can relate to that sigh. I use it well. I also like the lazy weekend lesson!
The best lesson I learned from my mother was never to be so dependant on another person that I can’t live without them. I saw what a struggle it was for her when my father died and I swore that would never happen to me.
Your mom taught you a very valuable lesson — even though I’m sure it was a very difficult one for her (and you) to learn.
I try the sigh all the time. My boys must be immune to it by now since they keep doing their own thing when I need help. I love the burnt pork chops idea. I have to try it around here. What a sweet memory of you and your mom eating pumpkin pie and watching movies together. Loved this post Jenners
Perhaps the sigh mostly works on girls (who are hotwired for guilt anyway) as I kind of remember my brother being more immune to it than me.
Great post! Too bad the sigh doesn’t work on my children, I might have to try harder! I don’t remember my mother burning food, but I have found that it works for me…only in our house it’s because I tried some new whacked out recipe with peanut butter and we all gagged on the first bite…that recipe got a nice black mark across it!
Stopping by from Mama Kat’s.
Any recipe with peanut butter in it is a loser in my book (but that is because I hate peanut butter). Whenever you need a night off, drag out that recipe.
I was worried about the prompts this week–would there be overly sappy responses, trite sayings, cliches galore? I find your post delightfully fresh and just the right amount of irreverence. Thanks for the chuckle!
I can’t even tell you how much your comment pleased me! Irreverence and fresh is what I shoot for! : )
I had that stupid color thing too as a present from my stepmother, with similar disastrous results. But what a great racket somebody came up with while it lasted!
I know!! And you never really hear about it now. I wonder if it was an 80s thing.
Burn something + order something out = brilliance! Why didn’t I think of that? Great post! Great humor -love the last one about being strong too, absolutely hilarious!
**Visiting from MamaKat’s***
Glad to be of service to the take out industry and to a busy woman! : )
What a wonderful mom!
Burning dinner and ordering pizza cracked me up. I’ve been guilty, but I really do destroy dinner accidentally. Sometimes.
-FringeGirl
Accidentally on purpose I presume!
Your mom taught you some great things, and I actually used the burned dinner trick last night! It was ok though, because nobody really wanted potato soup. The pizza was much better. I love the story about dressing like a marshmallow, and had a friend in high school who must have had her colors done too. She was always wearing a pastel shirt and pant set.
Your friend must have been a spring … that is what doomed me — pastels and more pastels. It was terrible.
And kudos to you on using the burnt dinner trick! : )
Ha ha ha! Very cute post. Your mom sounds like she was a great lady.
My mom was a fun lady … and another thing I forgot to mention was that she could never get Jell-O to jell … but I guess I unlearned that lesson as I’ve been quite successful with my Jell-O attempts. : )
Such a sweet and hilarious way of bringing back some good memories..
It was a fun way to remember her and not get too weepy.
Oh yes! The sigh! Lethal when used with “the look”. I have a 75% success rate when I use the both of them at the same time. Now I’m liking the idea of burning dinner. Another ploy I use is just to make a shitload of whatever I DO cook, then serve leftovers for a few days.
Whenever I do the leftover thing, then I find Mr. Jenners suddenly finds an excuse to eat out!!! I’ve gotta remember to start doubling my recipes now!
And I’ve got to work on my look!
I don’t do very much on Twitter these days either… too much information!
Love the lessons your mum taught you: that you can be strong and still wear marshmallow-coloured clothing!
The other day I actually bought a bright peach colored jacket instead of the black one that I automatically was reaching for. Perhaps I will return to my spring roots!
Perfecting the sign is an important accomplishment. Very necessary now that I own a three year old boy.
I love “owning” a three-year-old boy. Is there a return policy on these boys? I have a 6-year-old I’d like to exchange for a quieter model!! : 0
When I saw Mama Kat’s prompts I thought you might be doing this one. Those are great memories of your mom – especially the girls’ weekend together.
I have perfected the art of the sigh. Unfortunately, my kids have perfected the art of deafness on demand.
PS Welcome back to Twitter! I’m on there sporadically (@Ms.Wasteland) and the pace drives me nuts, too. I think if you use Tweetdeck (or a similar app) and arrange your people into lists it helps a little.
You’re so right … this prompt just called to me as soon as I saw it. It felt to good to think back and remember this stuff.
And I love your kid’s counter-attack to your sigh. : )
Thanks for the tip on Tweedeck. I’ll have to check it out … I need all the help I can get.
Hi Jenners
What a beautiful post! It is ten years this year since my mum died, and your post rekindled similar fond memories from my own childhood. The first zany thought that popped into my head was a piece of advice Mum used to give “Make sure your hair and shoes are presentable and you can get away with alot in between” I mean honestly! My Mum’s love of books and classic old movies, also thankfully rubbed off.
Thanks for sharing your memories
I’m glad this thought stirred up some good memories of your mom. And I think she has a point — my crazy bed head of hair could detract from anything (even if I was wearing a suit). : )
thanks for sharing
martine
And thanks for reading!
What a great memory of watching movies with your mom. It’s a nice memory to revisit every time you have pumpkin pie.
Now I know why I want to sob whenever I eat pumpkin pie! : )
My daughter used to yell, “Mom, anything but the sigh!”
And my girls and I had occasional ‘Couch Potato weekends’ – the goal of which was to not move off the sofabed, except to answer the door for the pizza delivery. The three of us would read, or play cards or board games, and watch movies. Fun stuff.
No wonder we get along so well … we live the same way! : )
Wow, what a great post. I’m so sorry for your loss, your mother sounds like an incredible person. What a great legacy. However, I have yet to perfect the sigh, though I am working on the guilt trip.
And Amanda from the Zen Leaf and I are planning an amazing book-lovers/girls weekend in April, i.e., a Readathon getaway! I sincerely believe we’ll have to incorporate pie, inspired by your weekend with your mom.
What a fun weekend you guys have! I highly encourage you to eat pie from the dish — it feels wonderfully sinful and fun! : )
Loved your post today! Do you often startle yourself by “being your Mother?” If you do, its a good thing–she sounds so neat.
I do sometimes startle myself by being my mom! And sometimes it is when I do stuff that I swore I would never do when I grow up! : )
I do like when I catch myself channeling the fun and creative side of her too.
My mom taught my how to deal with a backed up toilet. Okay, she taught me lots of other things, too, but when the toilet backed up in my college apt, my roomie and I called my mom. My dad answered and all I said was, “Is mom there?” Because I didn’t need a lecture on the physics of toilets. My mom is the practical one in our family.
And yes, I know a plunger is pretty self-explanatory. I was 20 and away from home for the first time.
Knowing how to deal with a backed up toilet is critical in life. And I know EXACTLY what you mean about wanting to get to the heart of the matter and not get a lecture on physics … my dad was the same way! You never just got the bottom line … you got everything else!
Lovely memories and thoughts on your mom. This was a lovely meme. P.S. good luck on the twitter scene. I’m considering it myself but it does seem very fast paced.
Twitter is fast-paced. I tried it before but got very overwhelmed. I’m not going to try and keep up the pace of it anymore. I’ll just do what I can and let the rest go. My main focus is always the blog — that is a slow enough pace for me. : )
Your mom taught you such wonderful lessons. I’m on twitter @kisatrtle but I too have trouble maintaining much content.
I think that is going to be my problem on Twitter too — that and keeping up with the pace of it. I give myself a month or two before I quit. : )
Your mom was a fun lady. I love the pj weekend. My my would have had a heart attack if she saw me some days when I stay in my pjs. and I don’t usually just watch movies, sometimes I throw a load of wash in and then watch. I love that movie, I’ve seen it a million times and still weep. The sigh just doesn’t work for me, I have to throw a hissy fit. i’m getting pretty good at the guilt thing as well.
Well, I mastered the art of the hissy fit as a young child so now I have to work on the sigh — it is much more subtle. And that movie is quite the heartbreaker, isn’t it?
welcome back to Twitter. I don’t use it often anymore but once in a while!
Glad you have some fond memories of your mom. I am hard pressed to come up with fun memories of mine and she’s still alive.
Well, we’ll see how long this Twitter thing lasts. I have trouble keeping up with the pace of it.
And I’m sorry that you don’t have many fun memories of your mom. : (
Sounds like you have wonderful memories. That was a great post!! I have that sigh down pretty well myself!!
The sigh is a powerful tool isn’t it?
I need so much to learn the art of the guilty sigh…I usually have to threaten and yell :/
PERFECT girls’ weekend!!!
Well, threatening and yelling work too…but I’ve found the sigh so very effective for instilling shame and guilt.
What a wonderful post! I need to learn the art of the sigh!
I thoughtnyou would have perfected the art of the sigh by now. I thought all moms develop it over time!