Poem: He Is Not Dead
by Jenners • 02/22/2012 • Love and Loss, Miscellaneous, Poetry • 36 Comments
When my dad died, it was very difficult to believe that he was really gone. For the longest time, I told myself that he was “on a trip.” I had repeated dreams that he returned to us from the mountains, and we all had a good laugh for how long it took him to get back to us. When I came across this poem by James Whitcomb Riley, it expressed my feelings perfectly. I thought I’d share this poem for no reason other than I was missing my parents a lot this week.
He Is Not Dead
I cannot say, and I will not say
That he is dead. He is just away.
With a cheery smile, and a wave of the hand,
He has wandered into an unknown land
And left us dreaming how very fair
It needs must be, since he lingers there.
And you—oh you, who the wildest yearn
For an old-time step, and the glad return,
Think of him faring on, as dear
In the love of There as the love of Here.
Think of him still as the same. I say,
He is not dead—he is just away.
–James Whitcomb Riley
My Dad On A Swing
I love this. Beautiful in many ways. I need this too. Thanks Jenners and hugs to you my friend.
Beautiful…dont know how I missed it
You are missing them right now. Just remember they are closer than you realize and you will see them again. And that photo of your father made me smile. Actually, upon first glimpse, I thought it was you. You are a good amalgam of both your parents.
I’m sending a virtual hug your way hoping you pains are eased a bit.
What a touching poem. I’m so glad it spoke to you again when you needed it to. That’s the power of words. Thank you for sharing.
Beautiful. Wow.
I guess I just needed a good cry today. Thank you for sharing. And my heart aches for you and your losses.
That is beautiful Jenners. Sending (((hugs))) your way.
What a beautiful poem. And what a perfect way to help understand the mystery that is death.
What a beautiful poem and such a wonderful picture of your father. I’ve found that grief seems to come in waves. You feel good for awhile and almost normal and then another wave hits when you least expect it. Sending happy thoughts your way.
As someone who belIeves in heaven this couldnt be more true. they are just gone until we reunite again.
This is a beautiful poem. I love how it expresses the idea that the one you loved is away visiting a land that needs him now. It’s so comforting and I hope that it brought you some comfort especially during a week that’s been especially difficult.
I’m thinking of you, Jenners, and hoping you’re feeling a little better.
I feel the same way sometimes. What a wonderful poem.
I don’t really want to get into things in a comment right now but this really spoke to me today too. Thanks for sharing your grief with us and some of the healing process too.
What a lovely post, and a great picture. Obviously, I didn’t know your dad, but it looks like that picture shows a lot about his spirit. Sending you good thoughts today. <3
I’m bristling about the comment that says “dissecting” a poem takes “everything of value” from it. With tears in my eyes.
One of the reasons this poem works so well is that it makes you think of death as another kind of removal. Metaphorically, the person has “gone away.” Your missing them becomes what it is, sadness about being left behind.
Oh, you know, I didn’t write that well. I was trying to say that I didn’t think my analytical response to the poem–that it works as metaphor–dampened my emotional response, which was to have tears in my eyes thinking of my own father. I know some people had some really awful teaching and they do feel like the emotional response is lost if they have to think too hard–but it is frustrating to hear them say that, because the thinking should actually amplify the emotional response. This is why Billy Collins says (in effect) that you can’t “tie a poem to a chair and beat it with a hose” to find out what it “means.”
that is beautiful and exactly how I feel about my parents. I’m book marking this.
I like to think of my dad in the same way.
That is a lovely poem. It expresses the sentiment just perfectly.
Oh man…this poem is wonderful! I had trouble comprehending that my daddy was truly gone, too (totally different circumstances), and would have loved reading this poem at the time. He’s been gone more than 40 years, but I still have moments of missing him, as I do my mother. I’m doing an in-depth Bible study right now and some stuff came up this week that put both of them on my brain big-time.
Thanks so much for sharing this AND that wonderful, fun photo!
((hugs))
So sorry that you are having a rough week. I will be praying for you. I hear that it gets easier…but I wouldn’t really know. I still miss my Grandma like she died yesterday and it has been 5 years. Sending hugs your way.
The pain of losing those we love never goes away and some times are just harder than others. I’m sending you big hugs today. I hope your week get better – just know that lots of us care about you.
I know what you mean….it doesn’t feel real that my Dad is gone MOST of the time. I am just going to think now of him just being away….not sure if it will help….but it is a nice thought to try to help me through the harder times….right???
I feel the same way about my husband sometimes. I sometimes think he faked his death because he was so very patient that he could stay in one position for very long (I was there when he died) and occasionally that feeling comes back, like yesterday when my husband’s uncle sent an email yesterday addressing my husband asking him if he knew if everyone was meeting for breakfast on thursday… um.. yeah..)
I think the poem is beautiful, and I can imagine that it would bring a lot of comfort to you. I am sorry that you are struggling right now, and wish you peace and healing. I am going to add you to my prayers today, and pray for a balm of healing to cover your heart. Hang in there, my friend.
Finding a poem like that, at the exact time you need it, is like a sign from the heavens. I love that photo of him on the swing. So carefree. Hope the week gets easier for you.
Your parents ARE on an extended trip – and one day, when it’s your time, you’ll join them.
You had no way of preparing for their absence, since they left without warning.
I am always struck by the seemingly minor event (or just the sight of an object) that will reopen my grief.
It does get easier with time, and you’ll begin to recall memories that bring a smile before a tear.
How beautiful and perfect!
I am like that with so many people in my life who have died. I think forget for a moment that they are gone and think “oh, Alya will be so pleased when she hears about this” or something similar. Lovely poem and know that many of us are thinking of you and your dad today
Sorry you are having a rough week. I love the poem. I like to go against academia and believe that a poem is just to be enjoyed for the fact it speaks to us, rather than disecting everything of value out of it. I wish I could remember who said poetry is to be digested (I’m a horribly un-well-read English major) (maybe e.e. cummings?) This poem speaks to you and you’ve shared it and your story … thank you.
Beautiful sentiments Jenners, I know I found great comfort in the words and hope you did too.
Oh man. This made me tear up. I know…..just know that I would feel the same…..that he is just away.
Sending healing and peaceful thoughts your way. I’m sure some days are rougher than others.
I’m sorry you’re having a rough week. It does get easier, but it never gets easy. I’m sending hugs your way.
Thank you for sharing such a lovely poem. The thought in this poem is both comforting and calming. I’m so sorry about your parents. Hope you’re doing alright.
What a beautiful poem! It’s been five years since my dad passed away and I still have moments when I can’t believe he’s gone. Once in awhile I like to think that he’s on a trip; seems like such a nicer thought. Sorry about your dad! Love the photo of him; seems like he was a lot of fun.
Beautiful.