During a recent e-mail conversation with Fizzy Jill, I somehow got convinced to write a song parody about Fizzy Jill (AKA Softdrink) and her mad Words with Friends skills (she routinely beats me by more than 200 points per game). The tune is based on “You’re A Mean One, Mr. Grinch” so, besides being a song parody, it is seasonally appropriate. If you forget the tune, you can hear the original here. (Oddly enough, at points I was able to use the original lyrics as they seemed spookily fitting, which leads me to believe that perhaps the song was written about Fizzy Jill in the first place.) So, without further ado, I present:
You’re A Sly One, Fizzy Jill
(Sung to the tune of “You’re A Mean One, Mr. Grinch” … though the rhymes are not precise so perhaps you shouldn’t really try to sing it. This isn’t the easiest song in the world to match the rhythms of. Just sayin’.)
You’re a sly one, Fizzy Jill
You really are a cheat.
You score the triple word points,
And steal all the good spaces
You’re a suspect player with a cheater app!
You’re a wordsmith, Fizzy Jill.
Your plays are highly suspect.
Your rack is full of vowels.
Yet you manage to always score points,
I couldn’t beat you with a
Thirty-nine and a half point word!
You’re a sneaky one, Fizzy Jill.
You play words I’ve never heard of,
You have all the 10-point letters and you use them,
Given the choice between “igloo” and “iglu”
You’d use the latter and get triple points.
You’re a foul one, Fizzy Jill
You’re a highly suspect player
Your plays are full of 50-pointers
Your rack is full of perfect combos
Fizzy Jill.The three best words that best describe you,
Are as follows, and I quote:
You’re a rotter, Fizzy Jill
You’re the queen of suspect words!
Your plays seem quite magical and you always have the perfect letters
Your plays are an appalling dump heap
Overflowing with the most disgraceful
Assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots.
You nauseate me, Fizzy Jill
With your super noxious plays
You’re a crooked jerky jockey and,
You drive a crooked horse
Fizzy Jill!You’re a triple-word and space stealer
And a double-word magician
With too many points!